You can’t have self worth without God!!

I have talk about the different ways to determine your self worth, but the biggest way we are given or self-worth is thru God. Without loving god you will never truly know your worth. I started loving myself and knowing my worth once i truly gave my life to Jesus Christ. Am still a work in progress, but I have all my faith in god and his love for me. So whatever i go thru good or bad I know he will see me thru it. And I know he hears all my prayers and my blessings will continue to come when he feels am ready.

The Bible actually has many passages that tell us what God has to say about our worth and or value in his eyes. Genesis 1:26-27 says we are made in his image, the very image of God. Psalm 139: 13-16 says we are fearfully and wonderfully made, and all the day of our lives were written in God’s book before we were ever born, confirming God’s prior knowledge and plan for our lives. Ephesians 1:4 says god chose His children before the foundations of the earth were every formed, and in Ephesians 1:13-14 we’re told we are God’s own possession, chosen for the praise of his glory, and that we have an inheritance in heaven with him as his children.

Notice the wording in each of the about phrases” are made”, “are fearfully and wonderfully made” “were written” “God chose his children”, “we are God’s own possession,” and “we have an inheritance.” These phrases all have one thing in common: they are things done to us or for us by God. These are not things we have done for ourselves, nor have we earned or deserved them. We are, in fact, merely the recipients of “all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ” (Ephesians 1:3). Therefore, we can conclude that our worth is not really of the “self” at all; rather, it is worth given to us by God. We are of inestimable value to him because of the price He paid to make us worthy – the death of His Son on the cross.

John 1:12 tells us that to those who received Christ and believed in His name, God gave the right to become His children. First John 1:9 tells us that if we confess our sins, He is faithful to forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we focus on how much God l loves us and the price HE paid to redeem us, we’ll come to see ourselves as God sees us, and that will help us understand just how much we’re really worth as children of the most high God.

Our self-worth is to often based on what other people tell us about ourselves. The one, true authority on our self-worth is Jesus Christ, and since He gave His own life up for us by dying on a cross, that should tell us just how valuable we really are.

WHAT DETERMINES SELF WORTH?

Determining a persons worth. Don’t confuse the worth of a person with the amount he or she is paid…. The sign confuses the value of person with the value of a product. As a person he is equal in worth to everyone else in this society. Your self worth is a function of how you value yourself. To build your self worth you must first discover your values and then make up your own definition of success. Your values are nothing more than what you value in life. You probably already know that society places excessive value on the outward appearances of success, such as money, material possessions, physical appearance, marital status, career and so on. In contrast, little consideration is every given to the loftier values of a person, such as love, integrity, kindness, emotional intelligence, forgiveness and inner balance, when defining ones success. This means that we have warped definition of success based largely outward appearances, which really results in a warped sense of the self-worth. The way you choose to measure your worth as person will serve as a major factor in the choices you make, the thoughts you have about life, and the way you feel about yourself. Know what measuring your using to determine your value and measure your self worth based on the factors you can control – not the external events in your life.

When you know who your are and your pleased with the person you’ve become you’ll maintain a sense of peace throughout life’s inevitable ups and downs. Rather than experience major fluctuations in how you feel about your self based on your latest success or most recent failure, you/ll believe in yourself regardless.

You determine your self-worth by who you are at your core. Doing so will help you focus on behaving according to your values, instead of chasing the things that will temporarily boost your self-esteem.

When your entire self worth depends on your achievements, you’ll avoid doing things where you could fail. In closing, determining your self -worth is fundamental to achieving real success in your life. Forget what society tells you about what it means to have succeeded, and endeavor to create your own definition of success based on those human qualities and virtues that you value most. Make it your goal to become successful human being by inwardly living and outwardly displaying those virtues you admire most and you will find no competition in your way. When you have built your self worth based on your own definition of success, you will find that all those material things or outer appearances that once seemed out of reach no longer define you, and that they paradoxically now flow freely towards you. This is what it means to have succeeded your way.

What does knowing your worth mean?

It is easy to identify when you don’t feel valued,respected or appreciated, but knowing your value is somewhat different. In my view knowing your value and self-work are inextricably linked. Self-worth is defined as “the sense of ones own value or worth as a person. As doing my own research and learning my own self worth that knowing your worth is a really broad statement that does not hardly begin to justify the reasoning for your life’s failures, missteps and headaches. To presume that you entered a bad relationship, landed a bad job or suffered a failed marriage as a result of not knowing your self worth, seems trivialize the scope of the situation you may have found yourself in at the time. In reality, most of our decisions are based upon core values, morals, and learned behavior’s either taught or experienced. Therefore it is not a lack of knowing your worth rather a lack of truly understanding how to require others to treat you as well as how you perceive yourself. Usually when you find yourself unhappy with personal relationships, your career or life in general its due to an internal sense of discontent. Your inner-self wants more out of the situation you’re in and there’s a conflict between how things are versus what you truly want them to be. Thats the easy part. Deep down, we know what we want but, we have no idea how are we supposed to get it.

Start small when you finally reach a point where you want a better life for yourself by any means, you have to start somewhere. Choose to make some small but, significant changes in your everyday routine. Wake up earlier, start an exercise routine or meditation routine. Eat healthier, drink water, less social media and more social interaction. Rediscover a favorite hobby or pastime, do something that you are passionate about or learn something new. Be intentional about making slight changes that are a break from your routine that add value to your day.

Make time for you I know what your thinking “How am I suppose to make time for myself with only 24 hours in a day” I wondered that too when i have a full time job, am single mom of 4, and they have there own schedule with sports and other after school programs they are involved in. But i had to make time for me. You may decide to take an extended shower or a walk to clear your thoughts. Whatever you choose, make sure you create space in your day to do something just for you to unwind even if it means you stop and do nothing at all. I chose to make my me time first thing in the morning I read this book Miracle Mornings by Hal Elrod its a must read. I am currently doing the Miracle Morning Challenge I get an hour sometimes and hour and half early before my kids wake and have my me time i mediate i work out or make my plan for the day. But it gives me some time everyday just for me.

The one thing am still learning is the art of saying no. This beautiful two letter word is a sentence in itself and does not require a reasoning or explanation. I am one of those people where it is hard for me to tell others no so i started asking myself these questions. Can this be done without me? Can I show them how to get this done so I am not the only resource? Is this being pawned off on me? If you answered yes to any of theses questions, then you can say no. The most important lesson to learn on the path to self love and awareness is, teach others how to treat us by how we treat ourselves. If you are unhappy with the outcome of your interactions with others, step your game up. Treat yourself with the respect, love and attention you wish to gain from others and watch them fall in line. If they don’t get on board, then let them go. Shed the dead weight and usher in a season of personal growth where you will attract the right kind of people who will value and respect you.

Malcolm X said it best ” we cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves.”

KNOWING YOUR WORTH

Chasing a person doesn’t give you value or build values in you. You earn your value by chasing morality and practicing dignity.

Have you wondered if you really know your own self worth? Do you love yourself enough to take the actions required for your happiness. Enough to cut the drama-filled past… enough to feed your mind and body in a healthy manner…. enough to forgive yourself… enough to move on.

It has taken me awhile to realize that i had no self worth that i had lost myself . That I had given all of me to others in my life that everyone else happiness was more important to me then my own. I had let what others think of me determine my self worth and that is not the case. I had to ask my self some really hard questions. Sometimes you have to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve.

One of my favorite shows is Grey’s Anatomy and Meredith Grey said it the best

” I don’t know why we all hang on to something we know we’re better off letting go of. It’s like we’re scared to loose what we don’t even really have. Some of us say we’d rather have something than absolutely nothing, but the truth is to have it half-ways is harder than not having it at all.

And your own happiness is not something you want just half of. You can’t love someone else if you don’t love yourself first and you can’t love yourself if you don’t know your own self-worth.

In the next couple of days am going to help you answer all these questions about yourself and your self worth. Know your worth. Know the difference between what you’re getting and what you deserve. Do you know the answer to these questions if not we are going to figure out the answers together

1. What does knowing your worth mean?

2. How do you know your worth?

3. What determines your self-worth?

4. Why is self worth important?

5. How do you develop self-worth.

6. How do you measure your self-worth?

I believe self-worth, self-awareness and self-esteem all go together. You can’t have one without the others. In closing I want to share a quote from Harvey Fierstein

“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no ones definition of your life, but define yourself.

Monday we will dive in to answering these questions if you want to share your answers before Monday please do so in the comments. I also have a Facebook page where you can message me privately or comment on my blog post there to. Please like my page I’ll be doing live discussions there also. Feel free to share my blog and fb page everyone is welcome you never know how your information could help someone else. Everything on my blog and fb page are free. My goal is to share my knowledge and struggles in hope that I can help another. Facebook page link is fb.me./freetobegrace.

All About Me!!!

I want to share a little about me am a single mother of 4 amazing kids. Hailey is 19, Cedrick is 18, Gracie is 10 and Wesley is 7 they are why I get up everyday and work to leave a legacy that my children can learn and live from way after am long gone. Its amazing to me that I have a freshman in college and a senior in high school am so proud of all four of them. I own my own Paparazzi Jewelry Business that has been a great success for me.

I have come so far in life to get to where I am today and this blog is where i want to give back and help others that have a story like mine and to help young ladies not to make the mistakes i made. I also want to be an inspiration to others to understand that what ever is in your past does not define your future. I am a recovering addict i have been sober for 7 years and 10 months. I have suffered with depression and low self -esteem all my life. I wasn’t understanding why things weren’t getting better in my life. Everyone had told me that once you leave the drugs alone life will get to be great that is a lie. I couldn’t understand why i was still struggling, why where all relationships and friendships where failing and my depression was getting worse and worse every year. Then about 2 years ago i was introduced to this group Love in the name of Christ. I had asked for help to get a washer and dryer for my apartment and they helped me to get it. But they also asked me to join there program loving you neighbor. This program changed my life they helped me with all these different classes that help me learn more about Christ. I have always believe in god i have seen him work in my life more than once. But they took it to a whole other level for me I learned to renew my mine and how i thought about situations in my life, Financial management and how god is involved in our money, they showed how to be a christian parent and active parenting Technics, also took a health and wellness class that i learned how to trust again and live a healthier life, the new image class taught me that god has a plan for me, and alpha class taught and answered all the questions about god and the holy spirit and cleared up whole lot of wrong impressions i had about what it means to be a christian. I started to look at my own life and all the toxic relationships i had or have had in the past. I decided to ask god for forgiveness for my sins and I asked him to show me where i should be headed and he did just that. And in my blog i plan to touch on all the changes i have been thru and how i have learned and am still learning to love myself. And making positive changes in life. I believe god wants me to share my story with others and touch on all topics being a mom, businesswoman, relationships, building your self esteem, living a healthier lifestyle, how to love yourself, how to be a positive influence for others etc. Am so excited to have you join me i will be picking a new topic every couple of days please if you would like me to talk about a certain topic leave it in the comments or send me a private message on Facebook. I will eventually be starting a Facebook group for FreeToBeGrace where i can do live discussions on certain topics and so you all can send me private messages. Also if you like my content share with your friends and family and click the follow button so you can get a notification when i make new blog post. It took me a while to realize i didn’t like the person i had become which is where the name of my blog came from am finally Free to me April Grace. And not the person that hurt and pain and bad relationships had made me.

Always Count Your Blessings !!!

I thank god everyday for blessings me and protecting me when I wasn’t making good decisions. And for forgivening me of my sins. And when I gave my life back to God, He has been blessing me and helping get thru all different types life struggles. Am a work in progress and am going to be vulnerable and step out of my comfort zone. So god can use me to help others find there way.